【Description】
Do you believe that both good and bad fates can be made possible? Is fate written in stone? Or can it be changed? If you already have a good fate, how do you ensure that it will last?
Think about your fate as a test; you are tested every time you are asked to react with kindness or evil. Your reactions will affect your wealth, luck, longevity, etc. How do we get a perfect score and be rewarded with an enduringly positive fate? Find out in this teaching in which Grandmaster JinBodhi delivers reminders that will prompt deep reflection on the nature of fate.
【You will learn】
- A different kind of test in life
- The story of a receptionist who became a manager
- The story of a stallion that became bun filling
- How kindness and evil affect our lives
- Ways to create a good fate
- Kung fu masters who endured blows to become good
- Ways to keep your wealth
【Featured aphorisms】
- Good fate starts with choosing kindness.
- Doing good or bad deeds and the extent of the positive or negative actions affect aspects of life such as wealth, luck, longevity, and our children’s wellbeing.
- Never cheat in life; take all tasks seriously no matter how big or small they are.
- Your fate is in your own hands: It’s shaped through the accumulation of all the details in life.
- Life consists of both yin and yang: One half comes from destiny and the other comes from diligence. Only through hard work can we create a good fate for ourselves.
- Too much of a good thing brings harm; conversely, things that are seemingly bad may benefit our growth and development.
- Pain and glory are inseparable, just like the ups and downs in life.
- Good fate comes with righteousness of thought and action.
【Content】
Hello, everyone. (Hello, Master.) We meet again today. Let’s continue our discussion about fate. I am not saying that you must adhere to what I say, and that by adhering you will get certain rewards. No, we don’t believe everything we hear blindly. Feel free to analyze what you hear from me. You will be able to control your fate by controlling the turning points in your fate. When you are able to control the key points of your fate, your life will be brilliant.
If we were to think critically about improving our fate, we would need to make a choice between kindness and evil. Simply put, who do you want to be? A good guy or a bad guy? Pick a side. Your choice will determine what happens in your life. Your decision will affect people around you, say, your family and colleagues. If you chose kindness, you wouldn’t lie, cheat or cause harm. It is a big decision so think it through. This is what I think about fate.
Our fate is controlled by an unseen greater force. We will be tested once every 3 years or 2 years, based on what we do. By who? I don’t know. Nobody knows who will test you. You are being tested whenever something happens that requires you to make decisions. Whenever good or bad things happen, your decisions matter. Life decisions are unlike school exams; you won’t have time to prepare. Children are exempted because they aren’t mature enough to decide. After becoming a teen, you will have lots of decisions to make, big and small. Everyone will be tested now and then almost every year.
How will you be tested? Your morality, compassion, contributions, generosity, selfishness, etc. How you react will show what you have chosen: kindness or evil. You don’t need examples for this. Regardless of who you are or what you do, you’ll be tested every year. Those who handle their tests well and get high scores are those who are loving, giving and tolerant. Having these qualities is as important as your life.
Don’t forget gratitude, filial piety and moderation too. In short, what is tested is your morality. I have been all positive so far, without mentioning the negative stuff such as telling lies, humiliating, hurting others, etc. In short, your morality will be tested. Some might say, “I don’t care about morality. I only care about my own benefits. Why should I care about others’ benefits?” People usually think this way. This part about generosity is exactly the part you will be tested on.
I have told a story several times: It is about a kind hotel receptionist in New York, a young man. It was a snowy night and he helped an old couple by offering his room. In the end, the old couple offered him a managerial job at their hotel. This is a true story. His fate was totally transformed by his small act of kindness. What are the chances of being made a general manager of a hotel when you have more than 100 colleagues competing with you? It will take a long time. You have a long way to go to become a general manager. It takes a lot of efforts.
That is the story of the famous Waldorf Astoria Hotel. That is an example of how one act of kindness skyrockets one’s life. That receptionist was made a general manager. The old couple was impressed by his kindness, not his managerial skills. I won’t generalize about people in the hospitality community. But how many can give up their bed for a stranger if it is not part of their job? The best they could offer is a smile. Why should they be kind to the guests? It is not like they get tipped, anyway.
The luggage carriers show extreme enthusiasm because they want to be tipped. I understand that life is hard; their tips get their family fed. Shortsightedness is thinking “tipping ensures great service”. The kind receptionist was different. He thought he should take care of the old couple. That’s how he got his good return. His act of kindness made him rich and auspicious.
We are tested all the time and many fail their tests. Do they consider themselves to be good people? Yes, definitely. They can be good but also selfish. Whatever you chose, kindness or evil, will affect your fate. That is basically how you are going to be tested. When good things happen to you, when you feel angry and pained and when you have a chance to take advantage of something, these are times you are tested.
How do you choose between kindness and evil? If you chose to be unselfish, compassionate, generous, giving, you will be blessed. I will use money as an example; it is easier to understand. When your decision isn’t good and you score less, you will be rewarded with less money. If you score well, the result could be $1,000,000. If you score lower, maybe $300,000 – $500,000. You can also earn as little as $1,000 – $2,000. That is how it is. How much you are rewarded is based on how kind you can be.
Does that mean if you are kind, you will be super-rich, and if you are less kind, you are going to die? Nope, not like that. The kinder you are, the more reward you will get and the more luck you will be blessed with. We have gone through what is good and what is bad. I guess you have no problem differentiating. When you are tested, your decisions will affect your wealth, longevity, how many children/grandchildren you will have, how good they will be, etc.
You will experience many tests that will affect your future: Whether you are healthy and happy; whether your family is auspicious; as a boss, whether you can get along with your workers. The extent depends on how much auspiciousness you receive in your test. Some will say they don’t care, for everybody dies anyway. Sure, but nobody wants to suffer while they are alive. Your fate depends on your scores.
Life is full of tests. You can choose kindness or evil. Be generous, giving and compassionate to obtain higher scores.
I also want to remind you; I have seen people who are greedy, ungrateful and acerbic. They think it is no big deal. All they do is complain about their life.
The Chinese have a famous story: “Bole and the Swift Horse.” Once upon a time, there was a horse with lightning speed and unlimited stamina. This horse realized its extraordinary ability. Its owner made it do all the tiring and dirty work. The horse didn’t like it and complained, but to no avail. More work always awaited; no work, no food. Its owner would sometimes starve and whip it. Farmers usually have whips for horses. If it didn’t perform as it was told, its owner would whip it. It was a living thing, so it felt pain. To avoid being whipped, it would fulfill its owner’s demands.
One day, the swift horse met Bole, an old man with a long, white beard. In Chinese folklore, that’s usually a somebody. “This is a decent horse. How old is it?” “7”, the owner said. Bole then checked out its teeth and hoofs. “Good horse. Are you selling?” The owner asked, “Are you buying?” “I will buy it with 50 silver pieces.” “Deal.” So Bole got his horse. He knew the swift horse could run tirelessly. If he sold the horse to rich people, or as a warhorse, he could profit a lot, say, 500 gold pieces. How much did he spend to buy it? 50 pieces of silver.
The horse was overjoyed that its speed was finally put to good use. The swift horse knelt before Bole to thank him. “Good lord, you have saved me. You saw my merits. You sent me where I can use my talent. Look at my saddle; it is so beautiful, with diamonds embedded in it. I am going to impress everyone!” The swift horse couldn’t thank Bole enough. Taking his leave, Bole asked the swift horse to do its best and serve its new owner wholeheartedly.
He went back a year later to check on the swift horse. Well, Bole offered good follow-up service. He wanted to know if his customer had any feedback. The new owner didn’t seem to have issues with his new horse, but he was not fully satisfied with it either. “What is the problem?” “Go talk to it; you speak its language.” So Bole found the swift horse. It appeared that it was frustrated.
“I look stupid running for a few bucks. A stable owner was going to pay 800 gold pieces for me, making me the highest-paid horse of the stable. This job sucks, I am quitting.” So Bole talked to the owner about the swift horse’s frustration. Its owner then increased its pay and also threw in a few bonus and benefit packages. The horse was quite delighted. “Not bad, I will stay for another year then.”
Bole came back after another year. “I am quitting this time for sure”, the horse said. Apparently, it was envious toward an older horse. “He is older, weaker and slower than me, how come he is the leader of the pack? Why? His ability, appearance, conduct and speech are not as good as mine. I was a slave before! He didn’t bear the bitterness of life. Why is he my leader? Why is he paid more than me? His saddle is more beautiful and expensive than mine. Furthermore, he has got a beautiful mare as his partner. I am sad about this. I am going to write a letter to tell you I am quitting. I need to change my job and find another owner. The headhunters are contacting me and offering me good-paying jobs. 1,000 gold pieces per year. I am quitting.”
Again, Bole went back to the horse’s owner to talk about its frustration. The owner was a general who knew nothing about keeping horses happy. But he liked horses — as a dish. “It is my horse and my money; I do whatever I want. I have no time for an ungrateful horse, so let’s eat it tonight.” The horse became bun filling that night. The horse had only one fault: comparing itself with others. It became unhappy after knowing what the other horses had. That led to sulking, complaining and quitting; lastly, it led to its demise.
When it first found a proper job, it could kneel to express its gratitude. People become greedy and ungrateful after working awhile. The swing to ungrateful and greedy sounds so yin-yang. When the horse’s greed peaked, it became bun filling. We always want a good ending, but it is not always the case. Many people are envious of the rich, but they don’t realize their own lives are the happy and peaceful ones that many dream of. They are not content and want more.
People start complaining when they are actually living a good life. I met a woman married to a capable man. She was babysitting a few children and complained a lot. She often complained that her husband didn’t spend enough time with her, and that he didn’t send her a birthday card, a Valentine’s card, or gifts. She also complained that he didn’t buy her the newest style of handbag. She got used to complaining. She thought complaining nonstop was no big deal. For those who had to hear her daily, it was a big deal. But she didn’t feel that.
All problems start with a small complaint. The wife thought it was no big deal. If the partners still love each other, will the wife complain? No. She starts complaining because she doesn’t love him anymore. Her complaining is actually a form of blaming her husband. Long-term complaining will cause consequences sooner or later. When you complain all the time, how can you love your family? Complaining nonstop is like a ticking bomb. It blows up and destroys everything when the time is up.
Your cooking tastes horrible when you complain all the time. You won’t have time to care for your family. When your mind is complaining, you won’t act with love. When you love someone, you are happy no matter what you do; when you light a candle, or pour a cup of tea, you are happy, with love in your eyes. When you hate someone, everything you say is hurtful. What will happen then? The bomb explodes, end of story.
Complaining looks fine, but it is not. I am going to tell you how to forge a good fate. After you achieve a few goals, will you still be grateful and down-to-earth like you used to be? Will you be grateful toward your business partner? Or will you start being harsh and demanding? Remember, extreme behaviors change the tide. When you demand more, you are making changes to your fate. You may think that a sulky mentality has nothing to do with fate. What you do now shows how you are tied to your fate.
I mentioned that wealth is passed on for no more than 3 generations. Many people squander their wealth soon after they get rich due to their sulky mentality. When a wife complains at home daily, the husband is under pressure from work and his wife’s complaining. If the husband got into a car accident, the wife may not think that would affect her. What if your husband left you with a huge debt? If you lost your house due to failure to pay the mortgage, you will soon become homeless. Your luck finally runs out.
If you could foresee this, would you still sulk? You would be grateful for having a good life now, and you would do everything possible to maintain it, right? Too bad this isn’t the case. People are not content with what they are blessed with. They complain too much and ruin what they have. How come? From the Buddhist perspective, they lack merits. I am saying this from an ordinary person’s perspective; they lack proper behavior.
They ruin their life and fate by doing stupid things. You only live once, and you are ruining your life. Isn’t that stupid? When you are rich and live in a big house, you don’t feel happy; will you be happy when you are homeless? You won’t even have a place to cry. Foolish parents are their families’ worst nightmare. The children are always the hardest-hit victims. A broken family will make a kid a man, at the cost of childhood trauma. The child will think twice before starting his own family.
Forging your fate is like the ants building their nest from scratch. The end result is your life and your family. If your house is built with low-quality materials, a slightly stronger wind will flatten it. There goes your family. So, everything must be done seriously; there is too much at stake. The Buddha says, “Seize the moment.” What does this mean? It means if you have a job now, do it well. Live your days as if they are your last. Don’t waste this moment. Do your best.
That is coming from an achiever of ultimate enlightenment. You won’t hear the Buddha say, “Let’s have fun; work can wait.” Seize the moment, be serious about what you do; that is Buddha’s advice. If you make tofu for a living, be serious about making it. Study seriously if you are a student. Lead your employees seriously if you are an employer. Don’t waste the blessings from Heaven. Do what you do seriously; that is how an ordinary person lives a remarkable life. That is how you can achieve more.
You may not make a big contribution to society, but you will be respected by your future generations. Your grandchildren will be proud of you, especially when they talk about how you built your empire. Our life has its own yin and yang. One half is decided by fate. The other half? Our hard work.
Comparison brings envy. Greed brings ingratitude. Seize the moment and treasure the people you love. Work hard for a better life.
This is what I have found: When people are taught and trained, or are given some guidance, most feel forced, physically and mentally. The world-famous pianist Lang Lang was forced to practice every day when he was little. Let me ask all of you: How many of your kids practice piano conscientiously; and they love practicing and practice every day? I guess most kids nowadays are forced to practice.
When they are forced to practice, they are reluctant. It is painful to be forced to practice. Their parents, teachers or masters force them to practice using temptations or threats. For example, a dad gives his kid $10 if he practiced today. If the kid continues practicing for a month, he gets a new schoolbag. This is just an example of temptation to motivate children to learn some useful skills. Persevering is not easy. When you are forced to do something, you feel pained.
An old saying goes, “To be bestowed with great responsibility, one must endure trials.” In short, you need to feel and accept the pain first. In Ancient China, to get first place in the national exam, one needed to prepare for about 10 years. Alone, studying for 10 years. To become the most powerful martial artist, you must train for 10 years.
One time I was practicing Energy Bagua. I practiced for 2 hours; it was raining and windy. Some branches fell on my head. I felt wronged, so I cried. My master came to check on me; I dared not tell him what was wrong. I thought, “Shouldn’t Master call off the practice now?” My master knew what was in my mind. “We will visit an old friend of mine tomorrow. He is also a meditation master and his disciples don’t practice as hard as you. We will take a break tomorrow.” I was happy; my master took me to visit his friend, and said I practiced better than other’s disciple. I got cocky. I felt like showing off.
So, the next day, what I saw surprised me. I immediately forgot about showing off. Those disciples took their master’s beating like it was nothing. That master was stronger than I am now, with strong muscles, big eyes and a black beard. He didn’t smile while talking. When we arrived, he said, “Sit down, there is water, help yourself.”
He said it in a serious tone. I got shivers by just looking at their practices. They began their day with physical training. The master had 2 rods in his hands. Those were real rods, not tiny sticks just for show. The 2 solid rods were taped together and the disciples lined up to get whacked in the ribcage. I wonder if the internal organs got smashed, becoming popcorn. There were 18 strikes to each side of the ribcage. More physical training soon followed.
There was a huge log tied to one end of a rope; the other end of the rope was tied to the temple’s beam. 3 or 4 disciples carried the log; they ran backward about 10 meters, then quickly ran forward carrying the log. They hit a disciple with that log. The disciple stood against the huge log and pushed back with his stomach. The log carriers were sent flying. That log would floor even a bull. The disciple got hit in his stomach and sent the log carriers flying. I told my master, “I will practice more before I show off.” Show off? Forget about it.
I had a moment with the big guy who took the log in his stomach. He was about 36 or 37. “That is a real iron body you got there.” “Nope, I need more practice so I won’t embarrass my master.” The other disciples told me the police force’s head coach once came to challenge the master. The log guy volunteered himself and took the challenge. “I won’t hit you; you hit me”, the log guy said. The head coach bruised his hand after punching the log guy a few times.
The head coach’s kicks were stronger than his punches. He landed a cheap shot when the log guy wasn’t looking. The human chest is easily hurt. The coach’s kick could hurt almost anyone severely. But after kicking the log guy, the coach went to see a doctor. He had kicked the log guy’s stomach and broken his leg. “Come on, that was embarrassing. Say no more.” Such humility. Powerful, yet humble. How great would his master be? He said they only learned to take hits, not deliver them. What had they gone through? Nothing, they just took hits.
The master called a new disciple who had joined 3 years earlier. “Newbie, show some stuff to our guests.” “What stuff, Master?” He was going to do whatever he was asked to do. “The brick.” His master threw a brick and he shattered it with a flying kick. It was a solid brick; no holes were made in it before it was thrown. And he shattered it. The kid had only practiced for 3 years. How? “They took hits from me, hard hits”, his master said.
Those disciples would graduate as martial-arts experts, surely. If they could withstand hard blows, think about how hard they could hit. They hit like tanks. Physical pain brought out true iron bodies. According to the master, those who trained under him were given a consent form to sign. They could leave if they couldn’t take it anymore. The master wouldn’t be held accountable for causing injuries or death. Strict masters produce great disciples. The road to greatness is indeed painful. You need understanding, wisdom and merits to differentiate real and unreal hardships. If you are not blessed with the merits, you will quit when your master gives you the tough love.
The journey to mastering a skill is challenging. One cannot develop a skill by working happily, unless he already mastered it. Masters embrace their pain; they enjoy it. They know pain is part of success, so they like it. Lang Lang enjoyed the stage after becoming an international icon. After getting used to the pain, he turned it into joy. A beginner will never get that. Is practicing piano fun? No way, if you have been playing for less than 5 years. After getting through the pain of practicing for 10 years, you will enjoy it. When people enjoy your performance and respect your hard work, you will enjoy it.
We need to feel and understand the nature of a matter, and then we can judge whether it is good or bad. Life will continue to test us and it can be painful. What makes us feel good can turn out to be bad. For example, kids like to eat candy. Kids like sweets, right? Well, a bit of sweets is fine for providing calories and energy. Sweets are high in calories, so they shouldn’t be eaten in excess. Many kids have tooth decay, especially the ones live with their grandmas who coax them with candy. “Gimme candy or I start crying.” “Alright, you win, kiddo.” That is how it is done. Grandma’s love turns to tooth decay.
Pleasure can ruin you, and bitterness can become valuable life experience. Bitterness turns kids into men. Learn to differentiate what is good from what is bad. Bitterness and glory are often connected. Happiness and bitterness always come together. The thing is, the road to glory is full of painful experiences.
When pursuing success, pain is unreal. All achievements require diligence. When you are young, indulging in sweetness ruins your life. Sweetness and bitterness come together; use wisdom to tell them apart.
Be grateful for what you have; that is how you live a good life. Don’t compare; there is always someone richer and more handsome than you. There are also people more miserable than you. So, be grateful for what you have, and play your role well. If you are a homemaker or mother, take care of your family well. With a mentality of giving, love and compassion, cook the best food to make your family happy. Food made with love can heal diseases.
Food cooked by a constantly sulking housewife is bad for health. Your food won’t taste good if hatred is all you have. If you are sulking, then when you see your husband and kids, you won’t be able to speak nicely like a compassionate wife and mother. You will be shouting your head off. What is the result of doing that? You will lose your home, which is your greatest wealth. You will be not just poor, but homeless.
How much you reap won’t be equal to how much you sow. You reap way more than what you sow, be it kindness or evil. Accumulating merits is like building an ant colony; the ants start from scratch, little by little, they have their homes. No matter how small a good deed is, do it with joy and great willingness. Your merits will accumulate. It is like your bank savings. Keep depositing money and after a few years, you can buy a house.
If you spend more than you save, you will have lots of debts. More youngsters are getting blacklisted due to their credit-card debts. They can’t apply for new cards. They can’t get approved for a loan, because they have no credibility. The government holds all your records; there is nothing biased about it. Failure to pay your bills will result in a fine. This is how fate works. We accumulate our own merits.
Let me remind you: Know what is kindness and what is evil; choose wisely. Sweetness only comes after pain. Be grateful for what you have, or you will lose everything. Being poor isn’t that bad. It makes you more careful with your riches when you get rich. In Western countries, most seniors have no savings. People from developing countries tend to save, because they don’t want to be poor. For example, I earn $1,000 this month. I can easily use all the money if I don’t control myself. A Chinese person would save $100 or $50 in case of emergency. The Chinese fear life without money. Being poor makes them good at managing their money.
One of our practitioners had a rich banker as a neighbor. His house was foreclosed during the 2008 economic crisis. The banker retired and rented a small place in a low-cost district. One day, our practitioner bumped into her ex-neighbor. “So you are here now? Someone moved into your old house.” “Bad luck.” The banker and his partner earned about $400,000 per year. With that money, they could afford an average house. But that wasn’t what they bought; they spent every penny. Their yacht’s docking fee was $30,000 per year. Their luxurious motorcycle was about $150,000. Sports car, a few hundred thousand USD. The thing is, they didn’t drive that much.
The banker was crying while talking about their lavish spending. They had never been poor; even a banker had no idea about financial planning. They had never been poor, so they had no idea about spending wisely. Why buy a yacht if you seldom go to the sea? If you feel like going out to sea, pay for a boat trip; it is the same, right? Why do you need a yacht? Isn’t that a waste of money? Look at the cost of docking your yacht. I should calm down. I shouldn’t get too emotional. When I see people doing stupid things to make trouble for themselves, I tend to become emotional.
Why do I get emotional over your foolishness? I am compassionate; that is why. Don’t ruin your life. Don’t waste your wealth and your good fate. Use them wisely. Being rich doesn’t mean living lavishly. If you do, you won’t have anything for your child. You’ll squander your wealth before you die. You will attract evil if you spend your money that way. To have a good fate, be righteous in your mind, thoughts and actions.
What are righteous thoughts? Thoughts driven by compassion. Thoughts driven by evil are evil thoughts. Compassion benefits others; compassion benefits you more. Keep your mind, speech and actions compassionate. If you are driven by compassion, you will act compassionately. That is how your family is blessed with auspiciousness, happiness, peace, wealth and longevity.
Accumulate merits; differentiate kindness from evil. Help others with a compassionate heart. Be righteous in your mind, thoughts and actions. For a good fate, be content and cherish blessings.