Interpersonal Relationships

About Karma, Buddhism and Self-Cultivation, Latest Recommended

【Description】

Family affection, friendship and love set the stage for adulthood. “Love” warms and improves life, but it can also bring trouble and sorrow in other relationships, which can be confusing.

Relationships can cause many people affliction. If you want to reduce such distress, you need to understand the root causes of the problems between husbands and wives, parents and children, and among colleagues and friends.

In this video, Grandmaster JinBodhi deeply analyzes love, marriage, children’s education, friendships and relationships in the workplace, and puts forward the fundamental elements of maintaining positive relationships. He also explains how to do it according to the laws of life without falling into emotional difficulties, and guides you to create a harmonious relationship network.

【You will learn】

  • The cause of problems between couples
  • The cause of problems between parents and children
  • The cause of troubles with co-workers
  • The cause of trouble with friends
  • The harm caused by “self-attachment”
  • How to improve relationships

【Featured aphorisms】

  • If you take good care of your relationships, you have solved one-third of the troubles in your life.
  • Be loving and affectionate, be aware of the boundaries and space between your loved ones and yourself.
  • Being cleverly confused is the highest mindset.
  • Put down that which you are most attached to.
  • When facing problems as a self-cultivator, first ask yourself what you have done and don’t blame others
  • Selfishness brings harm.
  • Be tolerant and calm, and always consider others’ needs when doing things.
  • Being selfish blocks not only relationships but also financial resources.
  • Self-centeredness makes it hard to accept others.
  • When ego arises, all negative aspects will arise.
  • The scene of a mother serving her child a bowl of hot soup makes people feel warm and shows love. When this love is magnified, it becomes all-compassion.
  • When compassion arises, relationships naturally change. What compassion brings to this world is love, care, protection, encouragement, praise, help and giving.
  • By solving troubles and all matters with kindness, you will obtain auspiciousness in the end.
  • Face the various fates and connections in life with compassion.
  • Having a family is the greatest fate.
  • You are the one who controls the distance between you and your child.
  • By being compassionate, giving others love and tolerance, your relationships will naturally improve.
  • If you want to have a better future and improve your fate, you must start with a kind thought now.
  • You are part of all sentient beings. You must love and care for all people, animals, insects and even mosquitoes that bite you.
  • If you understand good and evil, your energy system will be unblocked and flow smoothly.
  • A kind and trustworthy person will gain sincere and trusted friends.

【Content】

(Moments flash by. Life slips away. Mixed emotions and bonds make up the journey of life. Joys and sorrows play the music of life. Love sparks the show known as life. Relationships, kinships, friendships and love intertwine and at times give rise to conflict. They are so complicated. Troubles and sorrows come from interpersonal relationships.)

Grandmaster JinBodhi Talks Karma Series: Interpersonal Relationships

Let me ask you: Do you have any enemies you don’t know in this life? No, right? Those you hate and fight with are familiar to you. A girl said, “I hate my mom the most. She controls me every day, checks through my phone, and supervises my schoolwork. She spies on me when I go out with friends and gives me little allowance.”

So what troubles us most is the bond between us and our closest ones. Our behaviours could be good or bad. When you are hurt, you will get annoyed. When you are cared for and loved, you will feel happy. Those who make you happy or sad are usually close to you. So learn to handle interpersonal relationships well; you would solve at least one-third of life’s distress.

(Meditation is amazing as it can be combined with real life. The flower of wisdom blooms on real-life troubles. In the convoluted web of interpersonal relationships, let’s find out what causes the troubles in family relationships.)

A male practitioner asked me, “Master, do you have any idea how I can leave my wife?” When he asked me this, he had wanted us to lock his wife outside; then he dared to ask. Otherwise they are always together. We persuaded him to stay. He said, “My wife is always with me.” I asked, “Are you guys newlyweds?” “Look at our age. Newlyweds? We have been married over 10 years. It is serious. Even when I go to the bathroom, she is right there beside me.”

I said, “This is true love.” “She thinks I am perfect.” A younger practitioner said, “Something is wrong.” He said, “Yeah, something is wrong with her.” What do you think? Is his wife sick? (Yes.) You all are not like this, right? Your love is not deep. So if you love someone, you need to have a certain control. Does your bond have to be inseparable? Some say yes. Then does inseparable equal happiness? No.

So for love, kinship and friendship, how close should you keep to be happy? You can be very close occasionally; this time should be no longer than one hour a day. Whether it is romance or friendship, every day, you need at least a few hours to do whatever you want, such as having a shower, etc. This is also your happiness. So even when you have love and affection, you should keep a certain distance and leave each other room for freedom.

When you are very close and love each other deeply, you want to know everything about him, otherwise you will be sleepless. But after knowing all, you will definitely be sleepless. Nowadays people suffer insomnia. So sometimes, not knowing certain things is actually good. Being a wise person without knowing all is the noble realm of life. You should be able to control this distance.

So when you are young and inexperienced, you may have strong passion and impulses. After your passion and impulses fade, you need to control yourself rationally. You may change after hearing my words. Before, when seeing your husband: “Hug me, dear.” Now you say, “Hello, my friend.” Your husband will say, “God, please take me. Seeing her is the bane of my life.” You shouldn’t do that either.

We are talking about the psychological distance that you should purposefully leave for the other party. Learn how to maintain interpersonal relationships well. After we understand the principles, we will get hurt less. We will experience less mental and physical trauma; we will naturally have fewer worries. What I have said here sounds like jokes. But these tips help us maintain the love at home.

Here is my first tip for you. Although you love him, don’t be like a ghost, sticking to him 24/7. Or he will run away. When women wear jewelry, they take it off when going to sleep, right? Although you like jewelry a lot, you can’t wear it all the time. How about your ears and neck, right? So don’t love like a plaster that is always sticky, and can’t be taken off. Even for a plaster, stickiness can wear off after 24 hours. Leave some distance for love to be created. This is true for both love and kinship.

(The string of affection makes no sound when too loose, but breaks when too tense. Gaining control of this degree is the key to family harmony. Proper distance is the glue that maintains marital relationships.)

Just like the netizen’s question I answered last night. If your husband wants to escape after 40 years of marriage, I will tell you to let him go. You say you can’t. If you love him or loved him before, or you really hate him, just let go. You have already killed him in your heart. Why don’t you let him go physically? You will just have one more paper, for divorce. Right? This is called setting him free, because the person has already gone.

They have argued and fought for many years. The only thing she can’t let go of is her husband’s wallet. Your persistence today is because of your greed. If you insist on marriage, which can’t be taken with you when you die, we call this being greedy. Greed for the past feelings and promises. Past promises are no different from farts. You just remembered it because it is a promise. The promise did not leave it’s footprint in the Universe.

When he said that he would love you till the end of the world, it was just a sentence, not an absolute truth. He said this under influence. Right? You could tell he was blindly in love. It was also because of age. When he is 130 years old, you won’t get excited no matter how pretty the person is. Right? Is anyone at 80 dating like crazy?

After being together for years, lovers may quarrel; then they remind the other party to remain true to their initial intention. Many people have heard this saying, right? Remain true to your initial intention. Sounds touching, right? I am reminding you not to forget your first love, your origins and where you come from. Where were you before being born? Before we were born, we were nothing. After some years, we will return to the state of nothingness. What else can you cling to?

There are all kinds of experiences in life. Things happen even when you don’t think they should. People who shouldn’t betray have betrayed. You’ve lost money, though you don’t think you should have. You got the illness you don’t think you should have. Things that shouldn’t happen have happened. At these times, we feel life is difficult. So a person’s life is a dream. Be flexible about things you cling to the most. Even for a dreamy life, if you think deeply, you can realize the paths to liberation.

(In a marital relationship, don’t pursue the passion of the first love, or force the other person to honor their promises. Learn to think beyond time. Let the relationship stay at a suitable temperature. This flows with the rules of life, and won’t get you trapped in relationships.)

I have talked many times about in-law and marital relationships. There is a lot of love involved, although they are not all romantic relationships. They are expressions of different feelings in different roles. But if you can’t handle relationships properly, you may hurt your loved ones, including your children, your mom or in-laws. Don’t be too harsh to people around you.

I am telling you, those who play others play themselves. You con him, thinking that he is a fool; once the fool realizes what you are doing, he will eat you. if you con your husband, he will escape from you. When you are conning someone, you think they don’t know; but do you plan to do this forever? They have time to reflect on your behaviors. Once they find out they have been fooled, they may shut the door on you and ignore you forever.

Many schemers eventually push their husbands into another person’s embrace. A lot of people gave away their loved ones with their own hands. This is not what they intended, but their deceitful behavior created the result. Many couples are not happy; people confide in me about their spouse. I might ask a woman, “What do you do when he is at home? You are not ugly; why would he be with someone less good-looking?” Why? Because she schemes behind his back. Generally speaking, many foolish women gave their husbands away with their deceitful behaviors.

A lady talked with me yesterday. She has been married for 40 years, but hates her husband so much now. We didn’t meet in person. If we had, I would’ve asked her, “How were you as a wife?” A practitioner doesn’t blame others when there is a problem. Question yourself first; what did you do? I looked at her photo. Although she’s aged a bit, she is still very pretty. Why would your husband leave you for someone else? What did you do? What are you like on a daily basis?

OK, I will say a little more; almost all of those who have good looks but poor interpersonal relationships make the same mistake. What’s the reason? Do you guys want to know? (Yes.)

(Improve interpersonal relationships. Build a happy life. Welcome back to Grandmaster JinBodhi Talks Karma Series Part 3: Interpersonal Relationships)

Most of those who look good but inflict emotional damage on others and have troubled relationships make the same mistake: selfishness.

Because of being selfish, they become too self-centered, greedy, exploitative and compulsive. “You have to listen to me, because you are my son/wife/husband.” “You must wear clothes according to my preferences.” “You must wash your face based on my standards.” “Your sleeping position and snoring sound must meet my requirements.” So right now it is good to have robots. “All of your actions have to meet my requirements.” After these are satisfied, she will push further: “Why are you so dull? You are not interesting.” So you have to play some tricks yourself. If you have too many tricks, she may not accept it.

Because you are too selfish, you ask for too much; you want to control everything. You want the color of the whole sky to be customized for you. As a small human being, you want to control everything related to you. Just like having a robot at home: You want to control everything by pressing a button of the remote control. This is the common mistake we all tend to make. We hurt others because of selfishness.

Regarding the education of children: If I think being a doctor is good, I would want my child to be a doctor. What if your child has brain damage? Can he still be a doctor? Sometimes parents don’t understand how to select things according to their children’s interests and goals. If Mom says, “You have to do it”, that is considered selfish. What if your child doesn’t like it?

If you force your child to marry someone she doesn’t like, she won’t be happy. When I say that, it sounds like no big deal to you, right? What does being unhappy mean? She is in pain, and in disgust. By forcing her to marry someone she doesn’t love, you are hurting her. Why don’t you teach and help your child to do what they want to do. Of course, I don’t mean bad things.

Talking about relationships, would our family relationships really be that great? Would our family ties really be very close? If we don’t handle relationships well, sweet affinity will turn to hatred. This change is usually created by us because we don’t know how to act. We don’t know how to be parents; when teaching our children, we end up pushing them away. We constantly bash, libel, humiliate and slander them. In the end, we destroy them.

But for moral reasons, kids have to love their parents. It is all about prodigal sons turning good again. Why? When he can think normally, he hates his parents. But for moral reasons, he loves his parents just because he thinks he should be grateful. He loves his parents because of morality. Parents should feel ashamed of this situation. Their behaviors create obstacles between parents and children.

So when the kid is growing up, he is adding layers of armor, a new layer gets added every month. When the kid reaches 30 years old, his parents can’t communicate with him at all. The gap is too big.

(Through Master’s insights, we reflect on ourselves. When there is trouble within the family, we first ask ourselves: “What did I do? Am I too aggressive because of selfishness?” Our greed and calculating ways have hurt our family, ultimately destroying family relationships. After looking at broken family relationships, let’s look at workplace relationships.)

In your workplace, it is all the same. People have bad relationships because they are selfish. “You have to be whatever I want you to be.” Because I am selfish, I hate you, your color, hair, look, the way you speak, your achievements and everything. How can you improve your interpersonal relationships?

Because I am self-centered, I think I am always correct. I don’t want to discuss with you guys; everyone must do things my way. The highest-level managers have the right to take this approach; they should have comprehensive knowledge and decision-making ability. A wrong decision may destroy what he has built and his investment. So he can make decisions. If you are not the boss, as a manager or an important employee, you have to think about others’ needs and leave room for discussion. You need to be tolerant and at ease.

Say, you are a designer and you are too selfish, so you see your designs as the most perfect artwork in the world. But if you opened an architecture studio by yourself, you would turn from an arrogant designer into someone who prioritizes customer needs. Do you know why? The customer may not like what you think is beauty. If you insist, the customer would go to another person. You are a designer, not an artist. You are not designing for yourself but for others. Like a tailor, you customize the clothes for others. If customers don’t like your design, they won’t pay you. They don’t want your service. No one wins. You can’t even support yourself.

So being too selfish hinders your interpersonal relationships, takes away gentleness and politeness and financial income. In work and business settings, the same problem exists. I think, whether you are a manager, a boss or a more junior employee, you need to know your position. You are flowing with the work of your boss. All your actions should follow his or her instructions. I am talking about normal jobs. Since you are working for others, you need to meet the job requirements.

(Self-admiration and stubbornness are stumbling blocks in professional relationships. Fulfill your duty, and be kind to others; then you are able to maintain professional relationships.)

There is such a designer; he says, “I will never cooperate with you. You need to respect my artwork.” Do you know how many artists were homeless? They just slept on a bench beside a garbage bin. In the end, they all went mad. Let me tell you a story about an artist gone mad. He was Caucasian, looked nice and spoke softly. What was his situation? He was receiving subsidies from the government. He was an artist and designer without a job.

We met in our center. He was so amiable and seemed easy to approach. After learning about his background, we told him, “We need a designer.” He had been unemployed for more than 4 years. Our center provides lunch, and he liked to come. He was jobless and broke, receiving a few hundred dollars in subsidies monthly. We felt he was nice and easygoing, so we sent a fellow practitioner to talk with him. We would pay him a few thousand dollars monthly to design for our magazines and newspapers.

Hearing the artist’s reply, I thought I had heard something wrong. After the fellow practitioner talked with him, he asked for a very high salary. I said, “You must have heard it wrong. Maybe he was joking. Let me talk to him.” When I was talking business with him, he said, “Do you know who I am? I used to design for a film company. The first-floor lobby of a skyscraper in Vancouver was designed by me.” I said, “Wow, really?” It didn’t look like he was joking. “Then how much do you want to be paid?” “$130,000 after tax.”

I started cleaning my ear; did I have trouble hearing? I said, “Write the number down.” After he wrote the number down, I asked, “How is your life been in recent years?” He said, “I have been unemployed for about 8 years. I rely on government subsidies.” “Do you have other friends and family?” “No. I don’t hang out with them anymore.” “But in your circumstances, you have very little income. Our center can’t afford that much money. Can we pay you a few thousand instead?” He said, “No. I have my own standards.”

My neck was stuck again. I found myself jumping out of the room. I talked a lot with him during this process. I said, “We are friends. And you have been eating here for a few years now. Give me a discount.” “No. I have my dignity.” OK, alright then. You can continue to meditate here. I wouldn’t drive him away because we didn’t reach an agreement. We are still friends when we meet.

You have to know that whether they are Chinese or other races, the mistakes they made are all the same. In Buddhism, it is called self-ego. Self-ego means self-centered. Everything is about me. Do you think the Western designer did the right thing? No. Then where has he gone wrong? Self-ego. My past status. So you see someone as pitiful, but you will find him hateful after knowing him more. When you offer a job, he won’t settle for anything less.

Then there is a Chinese woman, she studies supercomputers. She is the same age as me, with average looks. Right now, she is still single. Her mom is an old disciple here. She said, “Master, what can I do to help my daughter get married? She can’t stay like this.” She wanted to dig a boyfriend up for her daughter. It was very frustrating. Due to the mom’s desperate request, I would often talk to her daughter about finding a boyfriend.

At first, I didn’t know her character. She is sophisticated, with a master’s degree and a PhD. She was so well educated and looked very natural and poised as well. “You are sophisticated and not bad-looking. How come you can’t find a boyfriend?” She put her lips together and said, “Master, you have underestimated me. You think I never had a boyfriend?” I said, “Yeah, he needs to stay, though. It is like counting money; it is useless if it is not yours.”

She said, “I am a gem. I need to wait for the man who has good taste. I have met 70 or 80 men who didn’t have good taste.” “Oh right, none of them knew you were a gem.” I was talking to her like she was my own daughter. “You should put yourself out more, and show more care for others.” I mentioned many things to her. She yelled, “I did all of them! Most didn’t stay more than 3 days! The longest was 2 weeks. What can I do?” I said, “Yeah, I got nothing.”

They didn’t come to the center for a long time. When they did come back, her mom said, “What can I do with my daughter?” “Amitabha. Just wait till the next life. She is like a computer that can’t be upgraded. Just let it be.” They didn’t want to listen. What update? She didn’t want to update. From finding a job to finding a boyfriend, I was talking like her father and provided her with so many ideas. In the end, she just ignored all of them.

Even if she were my own daughter, I still couldn’t help her. That is her fate. Wait for the next life then. I could do nothing. She didn’t want to update herself. She never said, “I made a mistake. Master, you are right.” I told her all the principles, and even set up an entire lesson just for her about self-ego. She cried after my lesson. But the next day, she was still the same. You want to update her? The signals didn’t match; the update was rejected. The talk was all for nothing.

So that night after the lesson, I sang a song at the center: “I used to ask countless times: When would you go with me?” I was so angry so I sang this song. I had no way to deal with it. That day I went to the hospital. I wanted to see a psychologist who could heal me. Telling me a joke would help. My heart hurt from this. I was so mad. So in this case, aside from other aspects, when your self-ego is too strong, you won’t accept others.

Let’s have a look at why we have negative emotions. The root cause is selfishness. If we dig deeper, it is self-ego. When self-ego arises, you will insist on what you are doing. You become stubborn as a rock, and aren’t able to absorb nutrients. Arrogance, rudeness, hurtfulness, selfishness, greed and disputes are all caused by self-ego. So when self-ego arises, all negative emotions arise. Harsh words and angry eyes arise. All kinds of vices come out and accumulate; wrongdoings and wicked thoughts arise, ones you can’t imagine.

(Self-ego is the root cause of all negative relationships. With the presence of self-ego, you won’t accept friendly reminders from others. You refuse to correct your mistakes, and miss opportunities to improve yourself. After learning what makes bad relationships, let’s explore how to make up for past mistakes, and repair broken relationships.)

So what about the opposite? How about kindness? When compassion arises, it creates love. Love is the opposite of hate. I want to protect and love. Love is not selfish. I want to offer and give. When older mothers and grandmas bring food to their kids, that is love. When you were outside for a long time, you would recall your mother or grandma bringing a bowl of hot soup to you. You felt so warm inside. That is love.

When this love is enlarged, it becomes compassion. When compassion arises, it offers growth to this world. It is loving, caring, protective, encouraging, praiseful. It is helping, offering and contributing. Then our interpersonal relationships would improve. So use compassion and kindness to change various social ties. To summarize, this is what we should do: Use kindness to solve all things and troubles; we will ultimately obtain auspiciousness.

I don’t know if ordinary people get the concept of good and evil. They may create chaos when trying to solve issues in the normal way. As the saying goes, “A knife for a knife, and a tooth for a tooth.” If you have attacked me, I will attack you back. Normal people have a more violent heart. This result is more negative. Using an attacking mindset to solve problems would ultimately be painful.

So we must use compassion to face various karmic incidents in our lives. Having the opportunity to become one family is a big karmic connection. If you have got the feeling to become a couple, why become enemies later? How did it come to this? It is caused by our lack of wisdom every step of the way. If no one teaches you, you would be rotten even if you were once good.

Many don’t have the understanding and knowledge. For example, your wife loves you, but she is too shy to say “I love you”. She doesn’t have the habit of saying, “Honey, I love you” when you come home. For girls in our village, they would even say, “I dislike you”, even though they love you. You could say often, “You are so handsome, husband.” Can you compliment your husband like this?

Actually, everyone wants to be acknowledged for what they are good at. If you say he is handsome, courageous, wise, gentle, responsible, and a good husband, he would feel that you know him better than his mom. “My mom often says that I am a useless bastard. But you see how great I am. I am willing to do anything for you.” So many macho men, especially the really fierce ones, want to get praise and affirmation from a female or their boss.

Everyone has this mentality. If you want your husband to love you and be wise and responsible, all you need are praise and gentleness. It is the same with your kids. Whether your kids will come closer to you or stay far away, it all depends on you.

(Express your love bravely. Stop criticizing; always give others affirmation and praise. This will remove the wall between family members, and warm up frozen relationships.)

Be a compassionate person, giving others love and tolerance. Our interpersonal relationships would change. Our feelings would also change. Those who used to fight would start to change today. But you must have the endurance. After a week, you say, “I can’t stand it anymore” and fight with him. Don’t do that.

There is a saying in Buddhism about rage: “Merits are depleted by outbursts of fury.” Although you give a lot of money and love, they will burn away instantly because of your outburst. The son you have raised for 20 years just picked up his bag and left. You raised him with meticulous care for 20 years; he has gone because of your outburst. Even your daughter wants to leave. How about your husband? Your son left once; your husband may have already left 10 times.

Your present life is the result of your past life. Your future life will be the result of your present life. If we want to change the future results, we must do things out of kindness now. Buddha said, “See a world in a flower, and a bodhi in a single thought.” One thought, what is this one thought? It’s the ability to differentiate kindness and evil.

I want to be a compassionate person. I want to be a kind person. Start from this single thought, and put it in family, social and professional relationships, and any loving relationships in the entire society. We are a part of all sentient beings on Earth. We must be merciful toward other people, animals, insects, even the mosquito that bites you.

An online friend sent me a message to ask why Buddhists are often taken advantage of by others. He asked, “Buddhadharma is all-powerful and mighty. The Four Heavenly Kings are all guardians. If the Buddha wants to kill someone, it would be easy. Why didn’t he fight violence with violence?” That means: If you hurt me, I will hurt you. He asked, “Why not?”

Last night, I gave him a reply: Because Buddha is Buddha. If an immature grandson slaps his grandpa, would his grandpa slap back? If a dog bit your leg, would you bite the dog back? If a swindler set your mother up, would you trick him back? Don’t do that. Buddha is compassionate. He is Buddha because he is comfortable getting the short end of the stick. He never hurts others because others have hurt him; that is not Buddha. That is a normal living being.

Our mistake lies here: If you hurt me, I will hurt you. If you curse me, I will curse you. You dare cheat me, I will kill you. This is definitely wrong. This causes the endless cycle of karma. Ultimately, you will pay with your life. So please remember the following “nonsense”: Disadvantage is a blessing. Be willing to be at a disadvantage. That is called giving. This is what normal people don’t do.

When we understand these principles, our body and mind will be unobstructed, and our wisdom will be unleashed. (Received.) After knowing kindness and evil, our body’s energy system will be unhindered. When compassion starts to be planted inside your heart, you will feel compassion is beautiful. When you decide to become a compassionate person, you will become incredible. (Received.) You will start to become a great person, as I mentioned before.

I want to be a compassionate person.

(I want to be a compassionate person.)

I want to be the most compassionate person.

(I want to be the most compassionate person.)

My blood is compassion itself.

(My blood is compassion itself.)

All cells in my body are compassionate.

(All cells in my body are compassionate.)

My soul is also compassionate.

(My soul is also compassionate.)

I love all sentient beings.

(I love all sentient beings.)

I love my family.

(I love my family.)

I love children.

(I love children.)

I love the entire society.

(I love the entire society.)

I love my friends.

(I love my friends.)

I love to be at a disadvantage.

(I love to be at a disadvantage.)

I am most tolerant.

(I am most tolerant.)

I can do anything.

(I can do anything.)

I can tolerate the intolerable.

(I can tolerate the intolerable.)

I can do difficult tasks.

(I can do difficult tasks.)

Be a compassionate person.

(Be a compassionate person.)

From now on.

(From now on.)

OK. Buddha has heard, seen and known it. (Received.) When compassion completely combines with our lives, our sharp voices and gazes become soft. (Received.) You will start to be gentle with your kids and your husband or wife. (Received.) So our interpersonal relationships will start to change from now on. (Received.) The most important thing is others won’t be hurt, and we will be happy as well. (Received.)

Think about it. If others won’t be scolded by you, they will be happy. If you praise others, they will be happy. Then how about us? We will receive happiness and respect. Previously, I have said that you receive what you give. Now it should be more understandable. From now on, I will be a dependable and kind person. Not long after, your good friends, those who trust you most and don’t do empty flattery, will come to you. (Received.) Our future and its good affinities are created by us each step of the way. So we should create our happy lives with our own hands.

(After listening to Grandmaster JinBodhi’s lecture in the karma series, we have found the reasons behind broken interpersonal relationships. We have also found that kindness, kind words, and kind actions are the essential ways of changing everything. They are the wisdom lights that relieve pain and troubles and the root elements that uphold interpersonal relationships.

Recalling the 3 lessons on karma, Grandmaster JinBodhi talked about the patterns of the karma cycle from different perspectives of time and space. Starting with different affinities, he revealed how to handle bigger and smaller negative tendencies; he revealed the key to improving interpersonal relationships through the thoughts and actions of people in real life.

From the karma trilogy, we learned that kindness is the medicine that dissolves all evil; it is the foundation to build a legacy upon; it is the way to change present and future life; and it is the method of escaping the cycle of sufferings. So stick to kind thoughts, and remain good in all actions. Seize this moment to create a happy future.)

If you would like, put your palms together with me:

I want to be a compassionate person.
(I want to be a compassionate person.)
I want to be the most compassionate person.
(I want to be the most compassionate person.)
My blood is compassion itself.
(My blood is compassion itself.)
All cells in my body are compassionate.
(All cells in my body are compassionate.)
My soul is also compassionate.
(My soul is also compassionate.)
I love all sentient beings.
(I love all sentient beings.)
I love my family.
(I love my family.)
I love children.
(I love children.)
I love the entire society.
(I love the entire society.)
I love my friends.
(I love my friends.)
I love to be at a disadvantage.
(I love to be at a disadvantage.)
I am most tolerant.
(I am most tolerant.)
I can do anything.
(I can do anything.)
I can tolerate the intolerable.
(I can tolerate the intolerable.)
I can do difficult tasks.
(I can do difficult tasks.)
Be a compassionate person.
(Be a compassionate person.)
From now on.
(From now on.)

OK. Buddha has heard, seen and known it. (Received.) When compassion completely combines with our lives, our sharp voices and gazes become soft. (Received.) You will start to be gentle with your kids and your husband or wife. (Received.) So our interpersonal relationships will start to change from now on. (Received.) The most important thing is others won’t be hurt, and we will be happy as well. (Received.)

Think about it. If others won’t be scolded by you, they will be happy. If you praise others, they will be happy. Then how about us? We will receive happiness and respect. Previously, I have said that you receive what you give. Now it should be more understandable. From now on, I will be a dependable and kind person. Not long after, your good friends, those who trust you most and don’t do empty flattery, will come to you. (Received.) Our future and its good affinities are created by us each step of the way. So we should create our happy lives with our own hands.

(After listening to Grandmaster JinBodhi’s lecture in the karma series, we have found the reasons behind broken interpersonal relationships. We have also found that kindness, kind words, and kind actions are the essential ways of changing everything. They are the wisdom lights that relieve pain and troubles and the root elements that uphold interpersonal relationships.

Recalling the 3 lessons on karma, Grandmaster JinBodhi talked about the patterns of the karma cycle from different perspectives of time and space. Starting with different affinities, he revealed how to handle bigger and smaller negative tendencies; he revealed the key to improving interpersonal relationships through the thoughts and actions of people in real life.

From the karma trilogy, we learned that kindness is the medicine that dissolves all evil; it is the foundation to build a legacy upon; it is the way to change present and future life; and it is the method of escaping the cycle of sufferings. So stick to kind thoughts, and remain good in all actions. Seize this moment to create a happy future.)