【Description】
Some parents believe that their children should have a great deal of free time to play and experience the beauty of Nature; other parents place more importance on sending their children to tutoring to improve their grades or help them learn various skills. How can we balance these two approaches?
Please listen to Grandmaster JinBodhi’s advice on how to provide the most nourishing upbringing for your children.
【You will learn】
- The necessity of tutoring
- The appropriate mentality parents should have for cultivating hobbies in a child
【Content】
(Hi, Master. I hope that my child will grow up playing outside. But other parents load their kids with tutoring or music lessons. Master, how should I balance tutoring with other activities for my child?)
Personally, I am not opposed to tutoring if you can afford it. If your child’s math scores have dropped, communicate nicely with your child. Maybe he didn’t understand or is a slower learner. If you can hire a math tutor to help with a few lessons and his score improves, this means that his intelligence is normal. If some private tutoring can improve his grades, then this child is not stupid. Sometimes, a child comprehends a bit slower or loses focus in the classroom. A few tutoring sessions will suffice. So, I am not opposed to private tutoring.
Tutoring is a good thing. In today’s society, the majority of white-collar workers who make enough to support their families graduated from university or graduate school. So, academic advancement has become a rite of passage that is a must. As such, some tutoring is necessary. Then we have music and the arts as extracurricular activities. Let’s say a child has a passion for art or for sports. Developing these interests can help your child gain options in careers and hobbies.
For example, some children are interested in colors and aesthetics. As teens, they know how to coordinate colors and have a strong aesthetic sense. So, the kid is sensitive to beauty. This intuition is positive. You can test out whether your child is interested in drawing. Sometimes, an interest in colors does not translate into an interest in drawing. Some might enjoy capturing beauty with photography. This is fine too.
They might not become professional photographers or painters, but it enriches their knowledge of life. They can express their imagination simply by using colors and pens to represent their understanding of beauty. No matter their chosen profession, artistic expression will be indispensable. Artistic endeavors such as drawing or music are good to learn.
However, some parents ask if their child wants to learn drawing. If the child expresses an interest in drawing, the parent will tell the child, “Given how much I’m paying, I expect you to become a world-renowned artist. OK?” Then the child is frightened. Who can guarantee he will become an artist? No one can. Some boorish parents would say, “If you can’t become a painter, then don’t learn it.” I think that is unreasonable.
When we allow a child to learn things, he neither knows what the future holds nor what an artistic life and livelihood hold. Will he be able to make a living? Will anyone buy and appreciate his art? All this determines whether he will become a painter. How could a teen determine this? Therefore, while helping their child develop skills and interests, parents should not expect the child to excel professionally. I feel this is inappropriate.
In principle, it is enough to give him opportunities to learn and cultivate artistic talents. If a child looks at a painting and is able to appreciate its colors and patterns, this is enough. If a child is determined to become an artist, then that is his wish. Parents can assist and support him. If the desire is not strong enough, I think the parents can just give him the chance to learn about aesthetics.